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  CHAPTER 13

  SARAH

  The air shifts the moment he walks into the room, and I immediately sense him. I busy myself at the counter making coffee, trying to ignore the magnetic pull I feel when he’s near me. My back is to him, and I jolt when he steps over and places his hand on my shoulder. That one soft touch lights my skin on fire. “Brad we should talk.” He snuggles his face in the crook of my neck. “We should and we will, but right now I want to be inside you.” In an instant, his arms are around my waist, his warm bulkiness blanketing my back. Sweeping my hair over my shoulder, he rests his lips on that sweet spot between my shoulder and neck, the one that drives me crazy. “Brad!” I whisper. “Brad, what do you want?” “I want you, Sarah. I want to worship this sexy-as-fuck body of yours. I want to make you come with my mouth, and I want to sink my cock into that sweet pussy, so deep, and so hard, you won’t be able to think straight as you scream my name over and over.” Yes please! I'm barely breathing. "But if you tell me you don't want that, then I'll go, but you need to decide.”

  My legs are shaking, barely holding me up, and my clit is pulsing as fast as my heartbeat. I squeeze my eyes shut, willing myself to fight him off when all I really want to do is give in to this craving. “Brad!” I plead. “Please!” I beg, not even sure what I’m asking for. He spins me around, and I don’t think I’ve ever seen his eyes so dark and full of need. It’s thrilling, in fact, it sends a chill racing down my spine. The heat, the desire, is clear, but there’s something else there too. Love maybe, and It’s terrifying. He has one hand on my hip and one hand behind my neck, when he dips his head down to kiss me. I regain some of my sanity and press my hands on his firm chest to ward him off. “No Brad, just stop, I can’t fucking think straight when you do this.” He staggers back a bit, more from shock than from how hard I pushed. “You don’t need to think Sunshine. I’ll never stop.” I stumble past him needing to get away, but he’s hot on my heels. When he seizes me by the waist, I shriek in surprise. “I can’t do this anymore Brad, It hurts too much.” He looks as pained as I feel. “This is never going to work, I’ll only end up hurt.” He reaches for my shoulder, and I jerk away like I’ve been stung by a bee. “Sarah, we need to figure this out once and for all. I’m not giving you up this time.” “No Brad, this is over, You need to go back to your life, and I need to move on.”

  I’m bent over with my palms on the kitchen table, my head down, trying to contain the tears. Brad loops his strong arms around me, drawing my body into his, and I instinctively mold into him like he’s a memory foam pillow. He nestles his face into my neck and speaks into my ear with a low gravelly voice. “Sarah, I love you. I’ve loved you from the first moment I saw you. I’ve waited a lifetime. No matter how long we were apart or how far away from each other we were, I never stopped loving you. You’ve always been in my heart. I want to spend the rest of my life making you and Ashley happy and safe. My mission in life is to make you both smile every day. Make all your dreams come true. Give me a chance to show you how good it can be. I’ll give it all up, I’ll do anything, because you are the only thing that makes me feel alive. You make life worth living."

  My sex is slick and ready for him. His words travel straight to my core. Who needs foreplay? I’m starving for him. I wiggle myself around, still in his arms, and lock eyes with him. “Brad, I want you too. Please.” I’m aching to feel his thick cock inside me, one more time. The heat between us smolders too hot for me to resist. I don't stand a prayer, not that I want to. One more time and then we're done. His dark gaze, the raging bulge in his pants, and his possessive kiss, tells me how much he wants it too. “Is this for me?” He growls when he slides his fingers into my soaking wet pussy. “Yes, Always you!” The fire between our bodies is blistering hot and I struggle to answer him. “I love that you’re always so wet for me.” He swoops me up by my ass with his muscular arms in one swift motion and sets me on the kitchen table. His eyes pierce into mine for the longest time, as if he’s trying to decide what to do with me. My legs are still wrapped around his waist, not wanting him to escape. I’m breathing like I just ran a marathon from the way he’s eyeing me. His gaze borders on half desire, half crazy person, and in an instant he’s on me. Capturing my mouth in a savage kiss, claiming me. The kiss is sloppy, needy, consuming, and neither one of us can get enough. I’ve never in my life, known passion like this. Never needed it, never wanted it, but with Brad I crave it like a junkie craves a fix.

  He yanks the belt of my robe flinging it open, my naked breasts spilling out for him to explore. His quick hands reach down and grasp my thin, silky excuse for underwear, and the material digs into my hip when he savagely tears them off. “Hey, I really liked those.” I giggle. “I did too, they were very sexy.” He grins. “I’d hate to see what you’d do if you didn’t like them.” I joke, but his eyes are too dark and overflowing with lust for comedy. “You are mine Sarah, tell me you know this.” Then his mouth is everywhere, kissing, sucking, nipping, showing no mercy. His touch is rough and merciless, at the same time tender and soothing to my flesh. I’m drowning in him, and when he breaks the kiss, I groan in complaint.

  Within seconds my back is flat against the kitchen table, and he sinks to his knees, settling his head between my legs. He swiftly tugs my body to the edge of the table and positions my legs over his shoulders. Wasting no time, he consumes me with his mouth and fingers. “Oh!” Propping myself up on my elbows, fascinated, I watch him eat my pussy. So hot! Unabashedly, I move against his tongue, needing more pressure, but he holds my hips down as I buck under him. Bastard! “Come for me baby, show me. Tell me you know you are mine.” My head flies back as his tongue circles and flicks my sensitive clit. My orgasm surges like a wave, from deep inside. My fists grasp the edge of the table, as I search for something to hang on to. “God Brad, Yes, Yes!” I chant, riding his face lewdly, wickedly, and loving every minute of it. “Come Sunshine, come on my mouth.” And I do, like a shot, long and hard. My back arches off the table, the heels of my feet dig into his back, and my hands desperately fist his hair as I explode. Over and over, the pulsing lasts with no end in sight, as my thighs tremble around his ears.

  I haven't even come down from my high, then he’s on top of me, kissing me. Hard. I push my tongue into his mouth, hot to taste my pussy on his lips. So erotic! He impales me with his glorious cock so abruptly and deep, I bite my lip and draw blood. I fight to catch a breath. “You’re a goddess. I’ve dreamt about you every single night for the past fourteen years.” His thick, smooth cock pounds me, relentlessly. Driving so hard and so deep, all I can do is hold on for the ride. The table underneath me is shaking so much I’m afraid It’s going to collapse. “Brad!” I cry his name, over and over, as he thrusts his dick in and out of me, possessing me. Sending waves of bliss to every nerve ending in my body. “Holy…Shit,” I moan and curse as another orgasm begins to cultivate out of nowhere. His hand reaches down between us and magically manipulates my clitoris until I splinter apart. My orgasm violently slams down on me as he continues his brutal fucking. He thrusts his hips a few more times then buries himself deep inside me, letting out a sexy growl. The muscles in his neck tighten, and his head falls onto my shoulder. His body goes rigid, and he grunts and curses, chasing his bliss. His cock pulses inside me as he fills me with his warm cum.

  Time stands still, and he holds me tight for the longest while. I groan from the loss when he slips out of me. He helps me off the table and when I stand I feel his warm semen dripping down my leg. What the fuck is wrong with me? “Fuck, fuck, fuck.” My body grows cold as the realization hits me like a bucket of cold water. “Sarah, what is it?” I quickly move to the other side of the table and swipe my robe up off the floor. “Jesus Brad, we didn’t use a fucking condom again.” The sound of my voice shrieks through the entire house as I hastily close the belt of my robe with shaking hands. He’s quick to my side, wanting to console me. I hold my palm up, halting him in his tracks. “Don’t Brad. Just don’t. Ev
erything is not going to be okay. I’m not on the fucking pill, and here we are making the same mistake fourteen years later.” “You need to leave. We can’t keep doing this. We’re over.”

  CHAPTER 14

  BRAD

  My eyes grow wide as I stare at her fiery expression. If she thinks we’re over, then she's fucking crazy. I can’t believe I forgot to use a condom again. I lose my fucking mind when I'm with this woman. Fuck! She looks pissed. I stride toward her, circling my arms around her waist and brush my lips against her cheek, trying to comfort her. “Fuck, Sarah, I’m sorry, I wasn’t thinking, but whatever happens we’ll deal with it together.” She slips from my grasp and takes a step back. The dark fury splashed across her face is alarming. “We… are not dealing with anything. We… are done. I can’t do this anymore, Brad.” She shouts, waving her hands in the air like a lunatic. She squeezes her eyes shut and inhales a deep breath, trying to reign in her anger. “Brad, please, just go.” I can see her eyes filling with tears before she turns and stalks down the hallway. Her words sound final, and they hit me like a ton of bricks as I watch her disappear. The bedroom door slams shut, the sound shooting through me like a bullet. I won’t let her get away again. We will never be over.

  I stalk toward her bedroom and tap lightly on the door. “Go away.” I lean my forehead on the door. “Baby, open the door. We need to talk.” I hear a whimper, and I just want to hold her tight and tell her everything is going to be okay. “No Brad, I’m done talking. I’ll keep you updated on Ashley’s condition, but you and I are over. Please just go.” I pound my fist on the door. “Dammit Sarah! Open the fucking door.” “Goodbye Brad,” She rasps. Never! The silence from the other side speaks volumes. If she needs space fine, then I’ll give her space for now. It will give me time to put everything into motion, but she needs to understand I'm not giving her up again. Losing her is not an option. “Sarah, listen to me, I'm going to go, but you need to know that I'm coming back. We're going to have a life together. The life you deserve. Ashley too Baby, I’m coming back for both of you. Please don’t give up on me.” I wait for a response. Nothing! “I’m not going to say goodbye because this is not the end. I’ll miss you and please know that I’m coming for you.” I swipe my bags from Ashley’s room and leave without another word.

  I stop by the hospital to see Ashley before leaving town because I want her to know about my plan. “Ashley, I have to go back home for a few weeks, but I’m coming back.” The sadness on her face breaks my heart. “Angel, I love you very much, and I want you to know that I’m in love with your Mother. I’ve always been in love with her, and this time I’m not giving her up.” I tell her, producing a tiny grin from her lips. “I’m going back home to settle things and put my house up for sale. I’m giving up my practice and moving back here. So don’t give up on me Angel, and please don’t let your Mom give up either. I promise I'm coming back for you guys. I want to give you both the life you deserve.” My career is important to me, but It isn’t everything. Sarah and Ashley are everything. I just need to prove it to them. I let Ashley know we’ll be keeping in touch and give her my cell phone number. “Call me anytime, day or night. We can still play video games together online whenever you want, and I'll still let you kick my butt." I kiss her cheek, and she rolls her eyes when I rub the top of her head and mess up her hair. “I’ll see you soon Angel.” I give her a wink, and I’m rewarded with a huge grin, letting me know she’s on board. Everything is going to work out. I’m finally going to have a life that means something.

  CHAPTER 15

  SARAH

  Five weeks have passed, and I haven’t herd a word from Brad, not that I expected to. I’m trying my best to work through these feelings and just accept the fact that I fell in love with a man I can never have. Maybe I should call him? I always believed that he let me down, but perhaps it was me who let him down. When he left, I didn’t even have the guts to fight for him. No one has ever fought for him. I was too scared. But why fight? That’s what everyone does, they leave. Why fool myself into believing there’d be a happy ending for us? Gah! My head is so freaking messed up right now. I didn't realize how lonely I was until Brad came back into my life. But he’s gone again, and It’s so much harder to fool myself. I’ll just continue to drag my broken heart around, hoping eventually, it’ll just fade away. But late at night when I’m alone in my bed, all I can do is think about him. Its Brad’s face I imagine when my hand slips underneath the covers. Its Brad’s name on my lips when I come. Its always Brad when I dream of happy endings that will never be. Its Brad I’m thinking about right now as I sit on the edge of my bed staring at this stupid pregnancy test that Harper insisted on bringing over here this morning. I’ve been ignoring what I already know to be true. So I decide to pee on the damn thing, leaving it on the bathroom sink to deal with later when I’m alone. Alone! I raised one child on my own, and I’ll figure out how to do it again. For now, I just want to enjoy this beautiful day.

  So much has happened since Brad left. Ashley is out of the hospital and feeling stronger every day. The transplant seems to have been a success, though she still has a long road to recovery ahead of her. We will have to wait a few months to make sure she is entirely in the clear. Last week the doctor gave her clearance to go back to school, and Ashley broke down with tears of joy. I know that Ashley and Brad have been communicating through text messages and I’m pretty sure she’s been playing Xbox with him late at night when she’s supposed to be asleep. She and I will have a conversation about that later. Not that I care if she talks to him, I do want them to have a relationship, but It’s important for her to get proper rest right now. Not stay up all hours of the night playing video games. But today I’m just going to enjoy this moment, and the permanent smile spread across my daughters face.

  Today is the formal dance Ashley has been desperately hoping to attend. I’m having trouble holding back the tears at the fact that she is well enough to go. “Jesus Sarah, how do you not have a migraine right now?” Harper complains, as she hands off a can of hairspray to one of the girls like a baton, before taking a huge gulp from her wine glass. Harper and I shopped with Ashley all day last Saturday and found the perfect dress for the occasion. Ashley enters the room in a pale blue, chiffon and lace dress, looking just like a storybook princess. I fight back the tears. Throwing my arms around her, I hug her tight. “Okay Mom, don’t mess up my hair.” I take a step back, holding her at shoulders length, wanting to admire her some more. “I can’t help it. You look beautiful.” I stifle the sobs and squeeze her again. “Hey, who’s cleaning up this mess?” Harper chimes in, noticing that I’m on the verge of an emotional breakdown.

  My house is currently in complete disarray as Ashley, and three of her friends get ready for the evening, but I don’t care. I smile at the clothing tornado and makeup bomb that seems to have gone off in my living room. The girls continue getting ready, squealing and giggling as they run through the house like Tasmanian Devils. I revel in it. “Did you take it?” Harper whispers. I plop down on the couch and twist the cap off my water bottle, staring at the mess I’ll need to clean later. “We’re not talking about this right now Harper," I say dismissively, hoping she’s unable to read my face since I’ve already taken a peek at the results. “We’ll deal with it later. Right now, I want to get some pictures of the girls before we leave.” I’m borrowing Harper's minivan to drive them to the dance, since my car is too small. One of the other Mom’s will pick them up once the dance is over. There are no boys involved in the festivities, thank god because these ladies are way too young and I’m just not ready for that yet. Ashley explained that everyone at school is going as friends, but I hear the whispers from the girls about which boys they hope to dance with.

  “Okay ladies, stand together and give me some beautiful smiles.” Harper leads the girls in front of the tiny flower garden outside the house. I’m curious about the cryptic looks that keep passing between Harper and Ashley. It seems like they’re harbori
ng some evil plan. “I’d like to get a picture with Ashley and me.” I insist, noticing the girls are already losing interest in picture time. Harper snaps a few more, and I’m about to head inside and grab the car keys when a black stretch limo pulls up in front of the house. My eyebrows draw together and I notice the deviously knowing looks that pass between Harper and Ashley. The giggles from the other girls, tell me something is going on, and they all seem to be in on it. I’m pretty sure my jaw is hanging on the ground when Brad steps out from the back of the limo, and I can’t control the girly flutterings I get when he stalks straight toward me.

  CHAPTER 16

  BRAD

  Sarah’s frozen like a deer caught in the headlights, a beautiful sexy deer, as I march up to her. I stand in front of her, blocking the sun from her eyes, and she gasps just before I cup her face and seal my lips over hers. God how I missed those lips. I lift her feet off the ground, drowning in the kiss, almost forgetting where we are until I hear the giggles behind us and Harper clears her throat. “Brad, what the hell?” Sarah exclaims when I put her down and break the kiss. “We have some things to settle.” “Brad, I don’t think…” I put my finger to her lips, stopping her words. “We’re going to settle this once and for all, but first we need to get these young ladies into the limo and off to their first dance.” I step over to my daughter and give her a big hug and kiss. “Hi Angel, you look beautiful.” Her cheeks blush, and she smiles brightly. “Brad, the girls are not going in a limo. I’m driving them.” Four teenagers groan in unison. “The dance is ten blocks away for crying out loud. I can’t send them in a limo, without their parent's permission.” “Already taken care of Sunshine.” I turn to Harper, and she winks at me. Sarah scowls between Harper and me as awareness begins to dawn on her face. “Harper!” If looks could kill. “Sorry, not sorry! Time to go ladies.” Harper claps her hands together and leads everyone to the limo. Ashley sprints back to us, as the other girls pile in the car with Harper. She wraps her arms around me and then Sarah. Tears well in Sarah's eyes as she watches them pull away, then her expression hardens as she turns back to me.